Whoop whoop - it's another misanthropic post from your people-hating gig-goer
It's been ages since I last complained about people at gigs ... so here I am, belatedly, to put that right. Yeah, other people are hell, right? After a recent four-week lay-off from attending gigs (a sad and desolate time) my grand return to the live scene last week involved having to endure two of the chief evils of modern gig-going. Number one: people whooping their approval. Not cheering, not clapping, not whistling (which is bad enough), but whooping, American-style (I think). At certain shows, after two or three people have started doing this grating whoop-cheer you're almost guaranteed to get a ton of copycat whoopers joining in. Horrible! And second: talking. Not just a bit of talking, but masses of ongoing conversations among people who apparently aren't even watching the band at all. Strange to say - I'm pretty sure that these two categories of people even overlap during the course of some gigs - so the manic conversers take a momentary break from their mindless chat to get a couple of whoops in before they get stuck back into their vital discourse about what happened the previous weekend. Crazee, man. So yes, this is what was bugging me last Friday as I stood there (not chatting, not whooping) in one of my semi-regular east London venues. Hmm, I should really have called this post: "How to lose (non-existent) friends and make everyone dislike you (even more)." Some people will immediately react to these churlish comments with: Lighten the fuck up, man. These were just some 20-somethings out with their mates trying to enjoy themselves. Not friendless old gits like you, you fucking misanthropic bore!
... which, I am, yes (misanthropic and prone to being boring). But I dunno. Aren't gigs primarily about the music? I'm totally OK with some crowd interaction - dancing, moshing, shouting stuff out, and (though it's rather dull) clapping. And OK, a few whoops might even be OK - but not dozens of them from a big Friday night crowd who don't even seem to be there for the band at all. And talking - yeah, this is obviously fine within reason and personally I've always hated those overly-reverential gigs where the self-appointed school monitors in the audience "shush" anyone who dares utter a single solitary slovo. But rabid, non-stop talking that goes on for song after song? Er, no - please go into the bar and be annoyingly garrulous there. So no, man, I'm standing my ground here. No whooping and no mass-talking - you're ruining the vibe. Much more of this and I'll have to start putting up signs like these cheery anti-cycling/ball games ones near where I live. "No whooping, no chatting" (by order of Niluccio on noise).
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